Wednesday, May 16, 2007

This is why I'm hot

Judy Jetson(JJ): Good Afternoon this is *******
Spidey Dolt(SD): (Thick accent) Good Afternoon. May I speak with Judy Jetson?
JJ: This is she.
SD: Ohhhh...JuuuDy!!! Happppy New Year!
JJ: *puzzled silence followed by* Happy new year to you too.
SD: ARE YOU STILL ACCEPTING NEW YEARS GREETINGS IN MAY FROM YOUR BRODA?
JJ:
**silently contemplating suicide..or homicide...or suicide..or...homicide...or suici....**
SD:
Oh! Look at you. You don't even know who this is (ohh you bet your annoying a$$ I do!) This is Spidey Dolt!
JJ: Hello Spidey (feigning the slightest hint of amusement)
SD: Hello Judy. Can I ask you a question?
JJ: (You already did!!!!) Sure what's up?
SD: If I took money out of my 401k....
JJ:Oh that would have to be handled at corporate through our benefits department.
SD: Oh. Yes. You told me that the last time I called. Is it still *****?
JJ: Yes.
SD:
Is her number still 111-222-3334
JJ: (Hmm..Let me see. You called about this 3 months ago, I told you to call the same benefits department and gave you the same name. Do you effin see a pattern her?) Sure. Yes. Her number is 111-222-3334 (Four the upteenth time you mo-fo!)
SD: Ohh. OK. Thank you Judy.
JJ: You're welcome. Have a great afternoon.

Who is Spidey Dolt you ask???
THE DEVIL PLAYING PRANKS!