Friday, April 28, 2006

Adam and Eve- History lesson

One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you’ve created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but I'm just not happy."
"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above.
"Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of apples."
"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you."
"What's a 'man', Lord?"
"This man will be a flawed creature, with aggressive tendencies, an enormous ego and an inability to empathize or listen to you properly. All in all, he'll give you a hard time. But, he'll be bigger and faster and moremuscular than you. He'll be really good at fighting and kicking a ball about and hunting fleet-footed ruminants, and will help to populate the Earth." "Sounds great," says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow.
"Yeah, well. He's better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick. But, you can only have him on one condition."
"What's that, Lord?"
"You'll have to let him believe that I made him first."

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Camille Paglia

“Lesbianism is increasing since anxious, unmasculine men have little to offer”…. Camille Paglia couldn’t have said it better even if she tried to. This is one of the only things that she and I agree on.

Camille Paglia seems as though she opposes anyone who isn’t in the art world by applauding teachers that teach students who “are not going to be big shot executives”. She sounds really bitter and comes of an angry-butch-extremist. She is constantly berating the feminist movement yet she doesn’t provide superior alternatives. She calls herself a feminist yet I haven’t read anything that she says to support women.

She says that she is against people such a Rosie O’Donnell who have subjected their children to the “glare of the spotlight” to make a political point and that’s why she kept the birth of Lucien (her son) out of the public eye, then she says that “now that I’m back in public after five years of writing this book (her current book titled Burn,…) it’s perfectly legitimate information”. How? Why is it ok when she does it and not ok when Rosie O’Donnell does it?

According to her, top universities are so bent out of shape on letting it be known that they are for affirmative action that they use it as a marketing tool. She walked a thin line when she said that “by supporting affirmative action, there has been a slow decline in respect for genuine scholarship”…I’m not even going to go into that.

Jim Multen was right when he said “with feminists like this, who needs men?”

I’m hoping that by attending her lecture tomorrow, I will be able to change my opinion of her because at this point, I’m not necessarily impressed.

Monday, April 24, 2006

I hate the makers of the iPod

It's a money sucking machine that doesn't quit...Have you ever heard of $49 headphones? Because if you buy anything that doesn't look like the iPod it looks tacky but if you were to opt for the real deal then you're screwed out of $50 that you couldda spent on more important things such as donating to the poor(or something....). UGH! and to think that the $50 headset breaks down after 6 months makes me want to bitch slap everyone at the apple store.

I had a sony discman for years and not once did the $9 headset break. Infact, the only reason I changed it was because I needed to update to a later model. and it only cost $9!!

Hate them!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Senile Bandit

Did ya hear about the 76yr old man who went door to door pretending to be a Dr. and offering free breast exams to women??


That's my kinda man! :)

Monday, April 17, 2006

Murphy's law..........

Why? Oh Why? Do you love me so?


Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Pretentious fools!

Maybe I should polish up on my knowledge of Merlot and Cavier and how to swirl my tongue when tasting wine, how to figure out what kind of legs a brand of wine has and all that classy stuff that my african ass doesn't know.

UGH! Pain. My armpit muscles hurt. Can you believe this shit? Yes..Armpit muscles. Who wouldda thought there was a muscle there? It's a total mind f*ck of a pain.

I'm antsy but it'll pass, I'm annoyed but it'll pass and I'm busy with work but even that will pass.

Monday, April 10, 2006

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Muscles I didn't even know I had

In my latest workout craze I took an Abs class on Friday and a kickboxing class on Saturday so I was in lots of pain this morning. Since I was going to work, I decided to pass by the gym and take part in the rep reebok class. This is a class that is defined as:

"Rep Reebok® is the newest development from the fitness specialists at Reebok University. A high intensity muscle strengthening and toning class. Routines are choreographed and changed every 3 months. Body bars, weights and tubing are utilized in this class. "

I don't know what about that defination told me that it would just be "a lot of stretching" (which i so desparately needed) but surely enough, I woke up in time to make it to class and that was the end of my life as I know it. I'm in soo much more pain that I was in yestarday and I don't know what to do..It hurts..All of it..It hurts..PAIN!

Thursday, April 06, 2006

"and I said, knowing you is loving you"

"WHAT?" That was my first reaction but instead I just smiled, blushed and changed the subject. Here's how it started:

I met him at Cosi, looking all cute(after changing about 7times..) and happy to see him after a LONG week apart. While discussing his trip to the west, he mentioned that his friends wife was giving him a hard time about me. This is how the conversation went:

Aye: Jade was giving me a hard time about you
Me: Yeah? What was she saying?
Aye: She just wanted to know who you are and stuff like that..
Me: and you said?
Aye: I said knowing you is loving you.

My first reaction was to ask him: So do you know me?

But since I'm not ready for the consequences of that conversation, I just smiled, blushed and our conversation shifted in another direction.

I don't want to over-think it. but it's run through my mind one or two times in the past two days. Wondering what he meant and should I take notice of it or should I ignore it as just another 'fart-in-the-wind'...