Sunday, March 30, 2008

Jennifer Love-WTF?

Who dressed this poor woman? Why for the love of god almighty why??
..Whats with the bowtie on the front of that unflattering dress? Bowties are fine but if you're going to have one on a yellow dress then get dramatic with it..the bigger, the better. Everyone will understand. The pants with the shoes are atrocious.Wrong in EVERY sense of the word!
Word on the street is that this outfit was actually meant for Miley Cyrus. She took one look and said "HEoll to the NO!"

Friends shouldn't let friends leave the house dressed like that. Remember to love one another b*tches!

Saturday, March 29, 2008

A little effort goes a long way

The last time I got an oil change at my neighborhood jiffy lube I swore that I would never go back there again…but lo and behold, I was desperate once again for an oil change and didn’t have the time or the energy to drive to the neighboring state(where I used to live) to get my oil change from my favorite people….so I cringe, grit my teeth, wash my hair and I suck it up and go to the same Jiffy lube that ruined my day a little over three months ago…

I leave the house looking decent (it wasn't planned. Pure coincidence). Nothing spectacular but definitely on the cute side and the minute I drive up to Jiffy lube a gentleman stops what he is doing and RUNS up to my car, says hello in the most pleasant of ways and ESCORTS me to the waiting area…On the way to the waiting room they(the knuckle headed employees that were total as*holes the last time I was there) ALL called me ma’am, they thanked me after every sentence, explained exactly what they were doing to my car and asked for my opinion and finally they ALL said goodbye to was almost as good as going to my the old oil change place where I was treated like the princess I am. This goes to prove my point, if you brush your hair and wear a cute outfit, you get better service…It’s not fair but that’s life.

Consider yourselves knowledgeable b*tches…go forth and wear cute clothes!

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Enough is enough!

Someone at Bad Boy *ahem..Diddy* has got to be able to afford a stylist for these poor girls...Aubrey and Aundrea have worn the same shoes in two separate photo shoots(on 2 separate days this week)....Which would be fine if the shoes were fierce...these shoes are "cute" at best.

they need to bring out their A game now more than ever because they are constantly being photographed while promoting their album...

D. Woods and Shannon look like they are going to the mall, Dawn and Aundrea look like they are about to hit the club while Aubrey...ugh! poor girl

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

It's SPRING b*tches!

I've already brought out my pastels...have you?

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Caption this

The problem with Audrey O'Days' hair, make-up and outfit is ___________________

Sucka for love

"I'm addicted to Kissing and Hugging
touching and rubbing
I'm a sucka for love, for love, for love.

If you're addicted to kissing and hugging
touching and rubbing
you sucka for love, for love,for love"

- Danity Kane

Thursday, March 20, 2008

When bad clothes happen to crazy people

So, crazy Heather McCartney a.k.a Ms. Outlandish is getting ready to go to court to hear the verdict on how much of her former husbands fortune, she’s going to get and she says to her stylist:

Ms. Outlandish: So, I’m probably getting $50million dollars which isn’t much. I wanted more. (GOLD DIGGING HEFFER)

Sylist: Yeah. That’s a b*tch…that A-hole! We have to make you look fierce. Let’s show him how hot you truly are.

Ms. Outlandish: YEAH!

Stylist: I know, lets put you in a clown outfit…BUT! With a twist. We’ll make it look like you are wearing a 70s suit. Maybe a Zoot suit? Nah. That’s too much..I’ll tone it down. You’ll be HOTT!

She showed to court looking like that. The judge gave her one look and awarded $24million dollars. Why? Because clowns don’t need $50 million!

Ps: Ms. Outlandish, Fire your stylist!! Wearing bright red lipstick with bright red eyeshadow is a crime against fashion..but THAT outfit is a crime against humanity.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Welcome to the Dollhouse

Anyone who even remotely knows me, knows that I'm a sucker for all things girly and brainless…chick flicks, chick music, angry girl music…you name it, I'm all about it… In fact, one of my favorite movies of all time is '10 things I hate about you'….R.I.P Heath Ledger…
The Danity Kane album came out yesterday and I have been going crazy trying to find it because it seems to be sold out everywhere…I went to target yesterday and the general manager told me that it's probably not on the shelf because a lot of people called in sick…
um??? I didn't get it…but I'm assuming he meant, to say "go fuck yourself"
So I decide that I'm getting it today come rain or shine! it is actually raining today. How fitting!
along with liking girly knick knacks, I also like being able to sample shiz before it's reviewed. That way, I can have an honest opinion of my investment….If I read a movie/music review before I listen to the album or watch the movie, I freak out and don't watch it…why? Most chick flicks/albums get a C grade…but if I've already bought the album and it gets a C rating??? Who gives a shit? I LOVE it! I'm a little screwy I must admit.... I didn't watch 27 dresses because I waited too long to go see it and by then I'd heard that it wasn't that great of a movie…I still regret not seeing it opening weekend…but I digress
Anyway, I go to another target today and it's sold out there too, then to Barnes and Noble and its sold out there…so I drive to the ghetto mall knowing it couldn't be sold out there and sure enough, it's not…at the checkout counter, I'm talking to the douche and telling him how I've been everywhere and couldn't find the album and he says to me:
"I know, it's sold out everywhere! I'm surprised we still have it at this store. Yesterday I went to about three targets before I found it and even then it was one of the last copies" um…….I'm I missing something? I don't get it….how and why would he go to target if he works at F.Y.E??? Even worse, why would he go to THREE different targets??? Who is this idiot and why I'm I trusting him to correctly run my credit card transaction??? Where is his baby sitter?
Welcome to the Dollhouse is a great dance album…I'm loving it…so far…I haven't listened to the entire CD yet...But so far…it's awesome….I love my brainless chick music…
I could be brainy and use big words, watch intelligent movies, read boring books and prove to the world that I'm super smart, a genius in fact…or I could have subscriptions to Instyle magazine,Vogue, Bazaar magazine and Marie Claire, listen to Danity Kane, watch "my fair brady" religiously all the while maintaining a 4.0 and being the fabulous person that I am now….. I think I'll stay the same and let my work speak for itself. Part of being a genius is being able to switch it on and off.
PS: I love how Diddy doesn't let the world forget that he is the queen B of bad boy….all his little snippets are thrilling …. NOT!
Oh yeah, if you're wondering, I just justified my purchase of the Danity Kane album...I love blogging

Monday, March 17, 2008

Don't try this at home b*tches

Spring is here and I believe that it is our (You and I) responsibility to remind each other that some things are better left on the runway....

This dress from the Spring 2008 Ready-to-Wear collection by Emilio Pucci looks fierce on the runway but is more likely than not to look atrocious anywhere else.... Very few people can pull it off.........

Consider yourselves warned!

Sunday, March 16, 2008

All the rage

I blogged about this a little while ago and now the April issue of Marie claire claims that they will be "all the rage this spring"...Thats right Bitches..consider yourselves educated....

Friday, March 14, 2008

Just for shits and giggles..

I know this is an old picture but its STILL funny

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Spring fashion alert

"If you can lift your arm up this spring, you're not wearing enough bracelets"- Salvatore Ferragamo