Saturday, December 31, 2005

Last thoughts on 2005

It's really depressing to realise that yet another year has gone by and I have done absolutely nothing that I can show and be proud of...
2005 was a crazy year in my books and I hate a lot of things about the year..a lot of ups and downs and ups again offcourse followed by downs..it was craziness...
but whatever dude! it's coming to an end in 6hrs and all I can say is FUCK IT!
it's over..let 2006 beggining..the year of joblessness, brokeness and lots of nothing..just like 2005..only difference is in 2006 I can legally drink my problems away...aint that just THE biggest thing a person whould should be proud of.....
whatever...everything sux.
LATER

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

FURYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!

my replacement only has 17,21654503216846516548465 questions for me and it's a series of repetitions then she'll question my answers...which I hate..like for example she asks me a question about some account and I wasn't working that account. It had been passed off to someone in my team to reduce my work load and so I tell her to contact Rachael*(the lady in my team who handled the account and would understand better) she shoots me back an email and tells me that looking at her "account rep sheet" (that I made for her by the way) it shows that she should contact Sam*....WHAT THA FUCK???? If you're soo damned smart why did you ask me in the first place? and plus that was a basic question about the account..Sam is the Rep on the account but he has nothing to do with Accounts Receivable...WHAT THA FUCK??? WHY do I have to say this? WHy do I have to have this stupid conversation? WHY? I mean if you're going to question my answers then why don't you just do it wrong and get corrected a long the way?? FUCKIN SHIT!

and she does this all tha freaking time...like she'll ask me about some customer and I'll tell her this is how you do it..contact e.g Ned* and he'll let you know...then she looks through the account and sees different names so since Ned hasn't responded to the email she sent 15minutes ago, she decides to call Bob and ask Bob...well Rob has nothing to do with the function..he's name is on the account but he's just a company guy on site..knows nothing about AR(accounts receivable) and he sends an email to his boss wondering what tha crap the woman is talking about..then his boss shoots an email to my boss, Ms. annoyings boss and me asking what tha crap is going on..then my boss says shoots me an email "Slave girl, please assist Ms. Annoying"...so then I have to reply all on Bobs email and tell him that it will be taken care of...and then reply separately to my boss's email and tell her that I'll help Ms. Annoying..then email Ms. Annoying a and tell her Ned is the only person who would know the answer..only to get an email back that 'since he wasn't responding, I thought I'd look around see if someone else has an answer!!!!!!!!!!" I MEAN WHAT THA FUCK YOU OVER-EFFICIENT BIATCH!!! it's not helping..you're not helping!!!!.

All that run around could have been avoided because A. maybe Ned is at lunch? or B. Maybe Ned has the day off, C. Maybe Ted is doing some research and will reply to your email shortly...GOODD LORD WHAT THA CRAP DO YOU WANT FROM ME? THIS IS REALLY TESTING MY PATIENCE... I understand that she would have questions..thats normal..but I don't appreciate her second guessing my answers and creating a raukus all over the place and inadvertedly increasing my work load! CRAPIOLI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1


*employee names have been changed..DUH

Thursday, December 08, 2005

THE NEW PMS

Well well well....... isn't life peachy.. NOT!!
Kinfo my man, I think I have given a new meaning to the word PMS. I mean who thought a person could get this agitiated over nothing. I mean seeing certain people in the hallway pisses me off, I almost wanted to punch a woman I saw today cus she irritates me. Then there is my new official title"Office Errand Boy" I mean what the hell....... I AM SOOOOO IRRITATED........

And you know what irritates me... I just saw on MSN.COM Entertainment section ofcoarse an article about how Kate Moss is bouncing back and is turning her downfall into a new beginning. HELLO people we all saw her litterally snort a truckload of cocaine... she goes to rehab for less than a month, and now ofcoarse she is all cured. I mean why would we think anything else. I mean it takes people years and even lifetimes to kick the whole coke habit, but I mean why would it take Kate Moss more than a month, I mean she is a super model, and they didn't put the word Super in there for nothing!

Sooo pretty much I am already feeling better now that I have bitched.. but really why do I have such a yuck look on life, I want to think life is beautiful.. I have decided I am turnign it around, I am going to live for today, and try to see the beauty in things.. what do you say Kinfo.... a new attitude?? let me know cus you know I can't make a decision without the other half of my brain!!!

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Stupid things women do!

Still HATE people! In the spirit of being indiscriminate, here are somethings I found on women and their intense stupidity:

What STUPID things do bitches/girls do?! First of all, is this blog capable of posting infinite amounts of information?! Probably not, so I suppose that I must whittle down that infinite list of female idiocies to a select few that I feel the entire female population needs to become aware of.

1. When a gal refuses to give up her phone number after a guy has asked for it before, she will complain to her girlfriends that no one hits on her while she secretly wishes that he just tried a little harder and made her feel wanted. What? You're going to say you don't like feeling wanted? Uh huh...

2. Boneheads’/Girls’ complete obsession about the existence of LEAGUES. Telling a guy, “She’s out of your league” is like waving a red flag in a bull's face. Halfwits/girls need to (1) chill out, (2) get off your high horse, (3) and realize your probably not in the league you think you are. Teach this lesson to every numskull/girl you know so that I never have to witness another pack of girls whining about how there are no good guys in this bar/club. You're right, there are leagues; you probably don't know which one you have a membership to though.

3. When blonds/girls complain about cliché pick-up lines. When was the last guy you approached a guy out of the blue? That long ago? That's what I thought. Sac up or move on...

5. When dullards/girls think it’s okay for them to roam around in baggy pajama bottoms they got for free that say things like “Abercrombie” (I don’t care where your friends shop for you're birthday) and poorly fitting, ripped t-shirts. Why do girls think it’s acceptable for them to wander around looking like they just rolled out of bed? (Want to know the difference between American girls and European girls? Ask a Roman gal how many days her spends walking around Rome in her pajama bottoms, ripped t-shirt and sandals.) it's like, "uh, I'm so naturally hot that I don't have to give a damn about what I wear to look good. Nevermind that I mysteriously have lipstick, eyeliner, and my hair well-brushed."

6. When ditzs/girls grab on the door handle for every curve, turn, unexpected movement. Yeah, your shrieking really helps me focus. No really, it does.

7. When dolts/girls say that they have a healthy appetite and proceed to order a full meal to only eat 1/6th of each dish. Thanks bitch, I just paid for that. IT IS A SCIENTIFIC FACT THAT YOU DO NOT HAVE THE SAME METABOLISMS AS US, so stop trying to prove otherwise to us. In real life, if you are just going to eat the side salad that comes with the meal, just order that rather than order a great steak your are going to waste. If you tell us you are going to eat it all, you're LYING. If you eat it in front of us, you're going to wish you didn't for the next 6 hours.

Monday, December 05, 2005

Office pranks

Here's a some interesting pranks I found when I googled, office humour. British people fucking rock! When you read them, read them with people who annoy you in mind. Makes it even more interesting.

Put a peice of onion or a clove of garlic inside the mouthpiece of a phone. Give it some time for it to fester and build up a strong odor. Then call them and keep them on the phone for as long as possible.

Go into MS Word or similar program on co-worker's computer, and add an entry to the AutoCorrect feature. This is a very simple prank that will send the novice user into a frenzy. Configure the AutoCorrect option to replace the word "the" with the phrase "you suck!". They will usually panick and start scanning for viruses.

Take clear tape and tape the underside of the mouse. Make sure you take the sticky end of the tape and apply it to the bottom of the mouse so it locks the ball in place. The victim will most likely check the connections in the back, reinstall drivers, reboot, etc., before they realize what has happened.

Change the coffee in the office coffe maker to decafe. Wait about three weeks(or untill you think everybody has gotten over their caffine addiction)and switch to expresso!

With someone who is on the phone a lot during work - This works if you have phones that the handset comes apart. Take the handset apart and put scotch tape over the mouthpeice inside. They can still be heard, but they have to talk loud to be heard. The next day take it off, and put it in the earpeice. Usually they will be yelling to the other person on the line the next day, and won't be able to hear them. When they complain about the phone, and get a replacement, do it on the next phone. After about a week you will notice the calls to be down considerably.

Simply pop out the 'm' and 'n' key on someone's keyboard and reverse the two. Any flat tool will work. Just pry it with little pressure and they will easily come right off. Then just sit back and watch the confusion.

Men are idiots!

It's the week of my birthday and I couldn't be happier but I still HATE men!

What STUPID things do cretins/guys do?! First of all, is this blog capable of posting infinite amounts of information?! Probably not, so I suppose that I must whittle down that infinite list of male idiocies to a select few that I feel the entire male population needs to become aware of.

1. When a moron/guy refuses to give up after a girl has said, “No” to his request for her phone number!! What is he thinking?! Obviously, NOTHING because it would require less than 1 second of thought for an imbecile/guy to realize that if he has to COERCE a phone number out of a girl, then he has NO CHANCE of getting what he wants from her (no need for the filthy specifics on this one).

2. Boneheads’/Guys’ complete ignorance about the existence of LEAGUES. Telling a guy, “She’s out of your league” is like whispering behind a deaf person’s back. Halfwits/guys need to (1) learn to identify girls who are too pretty and/or intelligent and/or cool for them, (2) learn to accept the fact that these girls will NEVER go for them, and (3) stop staring at them and/or following them around. Teach this lesson to every numskull/guy you know so that I never have to witness another bulging balding man in a loud, silk shirt with a foreign accent and hairy arms go up to another hot girl again.

3. When blockheads/guys use cliché pick-up lines to hit on a girl. Unless a guy is as fine as Josh Duhamel (http://www.nbc.com/Las_Vegas/bios/Josh_Duhamel.html is proof that you ARE NOT), where it doesn’t matter what comes out of his luscious lips, he needs to drop the cheesy lines and be himself.

4. When dunces/guys DON’T use cliché pick-up lines to hit on a girl, but the guys aren’t funny or hot. They will get nowhere. Yes, it’s harsh. But stop whining and go make some money so that you can at least pick up a gold-digger who doesn’t care how ugly and boring you are.

5. When dullards/guys think it’s okay for them to roam around in baggy t-shirts they got for free that say things like “Race for the Cure 2002” (I don’t care if you support breast cancer causes) and poorly fitting ankle-biting jeans. Why do guys think it’s acceptable for them to wander around looking like bums? (once again, the Josh Duhamel exception applies b/c girls are too busy imagining such hotties naked to notice their clothes anyways)

6. When oafs/guys drive dangerously quickly/recklessly to show off to a girl. Yeah, after you make us piss our pants from fear we just want to scream out, “God that was hot! Pull over so we can make out!”

7. When dolts/guys say that they hate it when a girl doesn’t have a healthy appetite and yet proceed to ignore girls with a healthy weight because they prefer fit, thin girls. IT IS A SCIENTIFIC FACT THAT WE DO NOT HAVE THE SAME METABOLISMS AS YOU DO, so stop expecting the impossible. In real life, those fit, thin girls who you like DON’T EAT ANYTHING. If they tell you they do, they’re LYING. If they eat in front of you, they’re going to skip the next 10 meals and work out for 6 hours. GUYS: wake up and smell the anorexia, damnit!!!

Friday, December 02, 2005

Stupid MEN!

Still in the spirit of loathing the existence of men! Here are more reasons why they suck!

Guys who don't talk to their girlfriends because they are incapable of emotional expression. Yes, I partially blame society for reinforcing the inability to relate emotionally to women, but come on, guys--grow up and TELL THEM WHAT YOU RE FEELING INSTEAD OF SULKING AWAY. PS--There are other "feelings" besides an erection.

Guys who complain they don't have a girlfriend and do nothing about it. Also, isn't it kind of weird that they just want "a girlfriend" and not someone in particular?

The fact that if a guy says he's from Stanford, it's generally a positive thing for picking up a girl. But if a girl says the same thing, guys are totally and automatically turned off.

Why does every freaking guy think that when girls get together we prance around in our undies and have pillow fights with our boobs flying all over the place? Sorry to break it to you boys but we have better things to do than grab our balls, wait, boobs. Sad day, tear. NOT.

I hate it when guys talk badly about girls to their male friends and then turn around to the girl and coo her with endearing crap. TELL IT TO HER FACE ASSHOLE. Now who's the bitch? TOOL.

Last thing: Girls DO NOT think about sex nearly as much as guys do. I haven't thought about sex in um, THREE MONTHS. That's right, bitches. Moral of this story: we have different agendas and I definitely don't care about yours, which means, I DO NOT FIND YOU HOT SO STOP THINKING THAT I WANT YOU. Who has the audacity to say: I know you want to have sex with me? WRONG. YOU ARE THE WEAKEST LINK. Get out of my fucking way.

Guys who say they aren't picky. Try to set them up with someone, and they will come up with any reason to not date them (like, "i don't like girls with bangs"). What it usually means is that the guy isn't that picky when it comes to hooking up. But if it actually involves getting to know the girl before hand, or being seen in public with her, she had better be unimagineably hot and with the perfect personality. MORONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!Good luck finding perfection!

Guys who pretend to be gentlemen, to the extent that when you get to a door first, and try to go through it like any normal person, they SHOVE you out of the way so that they can hold it and push you through!! Then they bow their heads humbly to show you that they are more well mannered than you. GAAAA!

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Reasons why men suck!

I got these from a different site! but I agree with all of them!

When a guy says some girl is hot and everyone else says she is a bitch and he says it doesn’t matter, she's HOT as though that makes up for it.

When you are at a bar/ club/watching Lindsey Lohan and a woman clearly has fake breasts but she is hot. Men will use all their force to try to convince you and namely themselves that her boobs are in fact real, as though having real boobs will actually give them a chance with this girl. “No man, they’re real!! They have to be real!” Take it from those of use who have the damn things, they are fake! God did not make women’s bodies to look like that, extreme makeover did. So yes, Lindsey Lohan’s boobs are fake, yes Britney’s boobs are fake, yes Xtina’s boobs are fake, and there is a 99% chance that if her boobs are big, well shaped and she is super thin then they are fake. And yes, people our age do have fake boobs, so just stop using that as one of your rationalizations.

When you are talking to a man regarding their ex and they say something like “but she broke up with ME” as though this minor detail somehow erases them of any responsibility for things that went wrong in a relationship. Maybe she broke up with you because you sucked as a boyfriend!

When men are attracted to women not because of who they are but because of how much they fit into the stereotype of what women should be (boring, needy, whiny, bitchy, naggy). And then they spend hours talking about how women are boring, needy, whiny, bitchy, naggy. Maybe if you didn’t date these awful women and actually were attracted to people based on liking them as opposed to how much they remind you of your mother you would not think that women suck.

Pushing a woman’s head down. DON’T DO THAT!!

When men tell you, “shut up about being single. You could get any guy you wanted.” Now honestly, if I could get any guy I wanted do you think I’d be sitting here alone at this bar talking to you. Also saying that the ugly guy with far too much confidence who just skeezily hit on me counts as a pick up is completely irrational. People who will hit on anything do not count. Also this comment just assumes that any women is just single because she wants to be and if she really wanted a man she should just try a little harder to notice the assholes who are throwing themselves at her. So angry!!! This “you must not be trying hard enough” argument is just like the whole American dream lie. The problem with this idea as well as with the American Dream is that no one actually admits that you can’t really have this “American dream” of getting any man you want. In reality this completely ignores the reality of situational factors.

How men will see a girl and think she is hot even though she is wearing a truly heinous outfit which includes one or more of the following: ugly platform sandals from Cathy Jean circa 1991, bad animal print, you can fill the rest in. Look at the details!! Why can’t men appreciate a well put together outfit!!

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

I hATE MEN!

I HATE MEN! UGH! Women too!
Pet peeve# 577969431295 in form of a story:-
One of my friends gets text msgs on her boyfriends phone that insinuates he's cheating. She calls the girl the texts are sent to and she confirms that he's been hitting on her. She confronts him. Proof in hand and he says he's disappointed that she went through his phone and denies sending the text msgs (even though the proof is right infront of him). Conversation ends..WITHOUT HER DUMPING HIM!!!!!!!!!!!
and is restarted two days later when she tells him that she wants "All or nothing" to which he says "I need a break".
Do you see what just happened there?
This girl!!!! UGHHHHH!!! knowing her boyfriend was working towards cheating on her still wants to make things work with him and he gets to break up with her!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WTF??? thats my question!
I hate men and women equally!!!
I feel bad for her but those text msgs were a msg so loud and clear: HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU! Ugh! when will people learn????

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Worthlessness to the max!!

I am having one of those day's.... one of those day's where I feel like a fool. I am sitting here at my desk remembering all those embarrasing moments in my life where I just felt low.. I am remembering all those times where people thought they were better than me, or made me feel worthless. Soo now all I can do is think about how I want to just show them, show them alllllllll!!!!!!!
ahhhhhhhhH KINFO I am soo mad.......... I want to achieve it all. I want to have everything I ever wanted... but I am lazy heheheh...I also think we need a project relief meeting. How about a La Madelaine meeting on Friday with a Barnes and Nobles addeedoodaa afterwards. I'll come to your place??? let me know kin to da fo!!!!!!!
Do you feel worthless. share your thoughts... how do we become successful???